It is the hardest job I have ever loved.
It is a job I prayed for, I hoped for, and dreamed of having. And for a long time I feared I would never get to have.
It is a job that is more difficult than I could have ever imagined. But also more amazing.
It is a job that brings me to my knees in prayer- asking for guidance, for patience, and for strength. It is a job that fills me with fear and anxiety as much as it fills me with hope and love. It is the most HUMBLING job I can imagine. It is the only job there is NEVER ever a break from, there are a million ways to do it, yet almost every single person I know doing it fears they are doing it wrong. Or worries they could be doing it better. Being in charge of another person’s world is a huge responsibility. Sometimes overwhelming, other times daunting, and a privilege and blessing too often taken for granted.
There are infinite approaches, philosophies, and perspectives of how to be a mom. We even make up labels for moms. “Helicopter Mom” “Soccer Mom” “Tiger Mom” “Free Range Mom”…. I could go on and on. With social media, smart phones, pinterest, and google, Momming is very different today than it was for our moms. And it will be different for our children. It is hard, scary, ever changing work. We rarely get feedback on how we are doing as a mom- unless it is negative feedback. Sadly, we are often judged most harshly:
1. by ourselves and
2. by other moms.
The thing is- I genuinely believe most moms are doing THE VERY BEST that they can to parent. And I believe that we are more alike than we are different. Most of all, though, I believe the more HONEST and AUTHENTIC we are about being a mom- the better. The world does not need any more pinterest-perfect moms. The world needs honest to goodness moms who make mistakes, share their experiences, and learn and grow. It is not possible to be a perfect mom, and the effort that goes in to pretending to be one is exhausting. A huge part of my recovery from an eating disorder has focused on allowing myself to embrace the messy, chaotic, and IMPERFECT parts of parenting and accepting that I will never be a perfect mom. Because that simply does not exist. But trusting that I CAN be the mom my boys need.
Being a mom is the hardest job I have ever had.
But it is by far the best one.